2 trips

Well, I’m back from two interesting trips- one business trip to Miami Beach for 4 days and then I was off to the Hamptons to see my mate Ben get married to his girlfriend of over 10 years, Elissa. I felt it was a moral imperative to make sure I made it to his wedding, as he was the only American friend who was able to make it to mine in Japan.
Being in Miami was a bit strange- not just the fact that I was staying at a nice hotel on the beach that was paid for by the university in a section of the city that is fairly schizophrenic. As we cruised through South Beach on the way to our hotel on a Sunday afternoon, the freaks, the models, the rappers, the bling, the tricked out Hummers and Ferraris were out in force. All of this was encapsulated in an art-deco wrapper of buildings, porticos and porches which, combined with the stagnant heat, lulled me into a dehydrated stupor as I lugged my bags up the steps of my hotel, valiantly forgoing the bellhops’ attempts to take them out from under my fingertips.
My room was unexpected; a suite on the 15th floor with an ocean view. No less than four spacious closets, a couch, king-size bed, minibar, all for my broke ass. Who had arranged all of this for the mundane purposes of a research administration conference? Did it really matter to me, I asked myself, as I hurriedly skipped out to the beach in back of the hotel. The turquoise, rolling waves that greeted me heaved themselves onto the white sand, and I knew this was going to be just fine. Little did I expect the complete racket the hotel would turn out to be, and the arrival of the fairly depressing conference members from points all over the South. By the end, I had gone to exactly one good seminar, the rest being duds, hung out with two interesting, if enormously eccentric, people, had managed to walk a bit up and down the beach, and had drunk an enormous amount of mediocre beer. Not bad for a free trip.

The Hamptons were different. I drove in from La Guardia Airport to the house Ben had rented out for us in Bridgehampton- very nice. My friend Cameron and his new, gorgeous wife were already waiting for me. The house was a miniature estate complete with a pool and jacuzzi, extensive bookshelves in every room, space for everyone…lots of old friends came, but the highlight was reuniting with Ben’s family, including his parents and 4 siblings. The family distinguishes itself by having every member enacting their own fascinating life journey. Whether it’s legal aid work in West Africa, becoming a surgeon, teaching in Morocco and Uzbekistan, or doing research work in Mongolia, everyone has a story to tell.
The wedding itself was touching, to say the least. It was so great to see Ben and Elissa happy and doing well for themselves. It was also good to see my old surf partner Ron and his new family, my writer friend and former LA roommate Michael, the Meltons, Dawn, etc., etc. The weather was great, and lounging about in the cafes and on the beaches was very agreeable.
It was slightly depressing being at the wedding though, as I was inevitably reminded of my own wedding ,and the fact that that was the last time I saw Ben and Elissa. I had some space from Tallahassee, and I was really able to reflect fully on Shoko’s and my own failed relationship. Ben’s mom was great, though. When I first saw her, she gave me a strong, yet sympathetic look, wrapped me in a big hug and told me that she was glad I was moving on and that she loved me. It’s really amazing how little words like that carry such enormous weight.